What Exactly is a "Good" Shape?

The more I interact with others interested in lingerie, the more I realize that even the most basic concepts are subject to opinion. One of these concepts is what defines a “good shape.” I feel like I spend a lot of time talking about that on this blog without having ever defined what I mean by that. There are a lot of different shapes that could be considered “good shapes” for a bra to give you:

The shape that I personally prefer as my “best” shape is rounded and a bit lower, even slightly minimized.

I find I get this shape in low-cut bras with somewhat looser upper sections. They don’t give as much support to the top half of the boobs but are often an easier fit on people with full-on-top boobs (like me) because the bra isn’t even messing with the top of the boobs. In fact, people with full-on-top boobs might even find they can size down in these bras. Another kind of bra that often gives this shape is the bra with vertical seams, like Curvy Kate’s Tease Me and Thrill Me bras. However, in my experience people with full-on-top boobs usually can’t size down in these.

Bras fitting this description include: Panache Harmony, Sienna and Confetti, Cleo Brooke and Frances, Bravissimo Demi Diva, Curvy Kate Tease Me and Thrill Me. I have not tried the following, but would venture to add the Cleo Eleanor and Bonnie. Also, according to Curvy Wordy's reviews, I feel comfortable adding Ewa Michalak’s “HP” bras.

Bras fitting this description somewhat include: Panache Melody, Curvy Kate Ella.

If you’re shopping online, you can usually recognize these bras by the lack of a ribbon or tight detail along the top of the cup. They also tend to appear to have a more round or horizontal shape across the neckline if you are just looking at it on a model online:

Bras with this shape can be good for anyone, even those without full-on-top boobs, and are an easier transition from poorly-fitted “normal” looking bras to the world of well fitted bras, especially for people who were used to Victoria’s Secret, as the shape is more similar.

Drawbacks to this shape include the fact that it often comes hand in hand with wider underwires which can tend to put your boobs in your armpits. Personally I prefer this because it balances my visual shape from the front and minimizes my boobs from the side:

However, lots of people find wider underwires very uncomfortable, while others dislike the lower, rounded shape and prefer an upfront look with more lift and projection:

This shape puts the boobs front and center. The look can be achieved by slightly higher-cut bras where the top section actually curves back in, and is meant to cover and support a greater proportion of the boobs. These bras can be a nightmare for anyone with full-on-top boobs as they curve back in right where the most stubborn part of the boob is and can cause epic quadraboob. However, they can also be more supportive and if well-fitted, are often LESS likely to shift under clothes and start to cut in and leave a line. These bras are more likely to give a fuller-coverage but lower-cut appearance when seen on a model—a V-neck shape:

People with full-on-top boobs can sometimes still wear bras like this but may need to size up and/or alter the center gore to get a better fit if they are seeking this shape. I know many people who prefer this shape as the gold standard of a well-fitted bra. Other bras giving this shape include the carefully structured Ewa Michalak padded bras, again according to Curvy Wordy (I have no experience of Ewa Michalak bras).

Bras fitting this description include: Bravissimo Alana and Dotty Spot, Freya Arabella, Lyla, Eleanor etc, Ewa Michalak’s “PL” bras.

Bras fitting this description somewhat include: Bravissimo Boudoir Beau, Cleo Lucy.

This shape makes the boobs look much more streamlined from the front, because it pulls them to the center and up. They look more dramatic from the side:

Although I think these two shapes tend to be the ones most sought out by women, there are a lot of other shapes, and many bras seem to give a shape that falls in between. There is this more relaxed, natural look, which is often achieved with full-coverage bras:

There are also a thousand shapes in between these extremes. I’m becoming more and more interested in what other women want and what shape they search for in a bra. If you like a shape that I haven’t mentioned, let me know in the comments!

The Visual Effects of Poor Band Construction

In a past post, I revealed how bra manufacturers have literally scarred me for life. But there’s also the mental scarring that comes from seeing an unflattering photo of yourself online. Here’s one that cropped up recently:

See the way the elastic at the bottom of my bra band is cutting into my flesh and leaving a deep impression that is visible even through a shirt AND a cardigan. This isn’t happening because the bra is the wrong size, or because of whatever “back fat” I may have—I know because I have a few bras that don’t leave a thin mark like this. Plus, it is only the strip of elastic at the bottom that is cutting in, not the whole band--I'm not bothered by the teeny-tiny bulges at the top.

I personally find I can mostly avoid this look if I stick to bras that have three hooks rather than two. But some of my best-fitting bras (Cleo’s Brooke and Lucy bras) only have two hooks.

I also find that the cutting in gets much worse when the band is too big, because it rides up and sort of sits just above where the back fat is:

But I think it would prove possible to greatly reduce this cutting in by improving the construction of the band—rather than using a weak mesh for the band and tightening that up with a thin strip of much tougher elastic at the bottom, why not make the whole band out of the tougher material? This would reduce the appearance of a thin line cutting in, in the same way that a flat lace band like this:

…cuts into anyone’s hips less than a string on a bikini or thong, regardless of size.

Making underwear lie smooth under clothes doesn’t have much to do with women’s bodies or size; it has everything to do with fabric and construction. Although I recognize that a bra band has to do a lot of work and is probably always going to cut in a little, I still think a wider section of elastic could reduce a lot of the visual effects of that. If the problem was removed, I suspect fewer women would be scared off from wearing their right size by the threat of visible bra lines. 

Bra Bands: In Which I Have A Lot Of Feelings

As we know, the band of the bra is supposed to provide the vast majority of the support, not the straps. That’s why it’s important to make sure your band isn’t too loose, and it’s the element of bra sizing that’s most important to not compromise on.

So why do I find myself gazing longingly at 30HH bras on ebay when I know I measure 27.5 inches around my underbust and should wear a 28J?

It’s because I’m so sick of my bras hurting me. And I remember that back when I wore a 30, they never hurt. But it’s the not the bras that changed, it’s me—I lost some weight around my ribcage and now there is nothing to cushion me from the underwires sitting right on my bones. These are my scars:

Not so sexy. And that's after NOT wearing a bra for a few hours. Please, bra manufacturers, do something about this! Lots of people, and not just in 28 and 30 band sizes, don’t have enough natural padding around their ribcage to protect them from the hard metal wires that are covered by nothing more than a single layer of fabric. By the end of the day, I feel like my bra is attacking me. But if I wear a band that’s too loose to avoid this, I get back pain from supporting the weight of my boobs.

Totally exposed.

This awesome blog post lists some of the features the author misses from her days of wearing Victoria’s Secret bras before she knew her size. I’m so with her. All I want right now is a super-soft, laser-cut Secret Embrace bra with the underwire completely encased in a comfortable foam channel. I just want it in my size. I truly think the cool pseudo-scientific bells and whistles Victoria's Secret uses in their bra construction are the reason lots of women are unwilling to switch to their "real" size even when they know it--because brands for D+ women don't bother to do any of that stuff (some brands do a little, but none past a G cup). 

Check out that concealed underwire!

Another problem, wonderfully documented here, is the rise of looser and looser bands. In my experience that’s how bra-hating starts: you find your 30s are riding up your back…you go down to a 28…that pushes you over the edge in cup-size territory...you suddenly find yourself relegated to a few boring styles, mostly in basic colors…you long to return to the happy land of 30 inch bands and OPTIONS.

The whole situation depresses me a lot. It's obviously something that D+ bra manufacturers put on the back burner as they think instead about fashion. Personally, I'd sacrifice a years' worth of floral patterns just to have a little more thought put into softening up the bands and underwires. It would make me so much more excited to put a bra on in the morning, and a little less excited to take it off at night.

Why Doesn't Freya Think We're Sexy?

Have you ever been looking at a cute bra for sale online and noticed these words: “Additional lining in GG-J cups for extra support”?

The phrase seems harmless, but beware those words if you’re hoping to purchase the bra you actually see in the pictures. Check out the difference the additional lining makes in the appearance of the Freya Arabella, a bra practically mythologized for its sexy sheerness:

It’s still a cute bra with the extra lining, but the fact is that the lined version looks JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER BRA made for GG-J. It loses the one feature that makes the Arabella distinct: its sheerness.

The same is true of Freya’s Eleanor bra of a few seasons back...

...and the Lyla, which I already decried here for its inadequate size range. Bravissimo is kind enough to feature a picture of the double-lined version in their catalogue, but there is NO photo of it on their website, so I dug one up.

Looks like a totally different bra, doesn't it?

I know what they’d say in their defense: the extra lining is necessary to provide the support needed by GG+ cups. Here’s why that’s bullshit:

        1. Since cup sizes change proportionally to band sizes, a 30GG (which would get the extra lining) is the SAME CUP SIZE as the 32G (which would not get the extra lining). The ONLY DIFFERENCE between those sizes is the band. If the unlined version can support a 38G, it would also be able to support up to a 28JJ. I keep waiting for bra manufacturers to pay some attention to this fact. Do they just not know about it?

        2.  Even more significantly, the extra lining does not give extra support. Want to know how I know that? Back in the day, I was the proud owner of a 30GG Arabella that had the extra lining. It bothered me that I couldn’t wear the bra as it was designed (sheer) so I simply cut out the opaque inner lining. It wasn’t too hard, I just had to cut carefully to avoid puncturing the outer mesh. When I was done, the bra looked just like the D-G sheer version--AND it still gave the exact same level of shape and support. The outer see-through mesh on the Arabella has NO STRETCH WHATSOEVER, so it can support the structure of the bra all on its own. The inner lining, on the other hand, has slight 2-directional stretch; the only function it serves is visual.

So if the additional lining doesn’t provide any extra support in GG-J cups, why do they put it in? Well, I suspect it’s because Freya thinks women with GG-J cup boobs wouldn’t want a sheer bra—for the same reason they refuse to make longline bras, padded plunges, and most of their cuter designs in those cup sizes even though every other similar company does. They just seem to think that boobs that big wouldn’t look nice in their fancier designs—that boobs that big shouldn’t need anything other than the basics. Well, I think they’re wrong. As a J-cup, I do want a sheer bra; I think it would look just as good on me as it would on an F-cup. The upper cup sizes really do deserve to have the same cute options as the lower cup sizes, even if there is a slightly smaller group of customers that needs those sizes.  Shouldn’t we all get to be a little impractical with our lingerie once in a while?

Why I Hate Freya

Hate is a strong word, but my frustration with Freya, and my aloneness in this feeling, is probably the biggest reason why I felt a need to have my own lingerie blog even though there are a lot of really great ones out there already. I just get tired of hearing Freya described as a conquering hero and the ultimate champion of big boobs, when a lot of their designs and choices cause me to resent them. Here’s why.

1.    Freya doesn’t design their bras to look good on big boobs. I know this isn’t a popular viewpoint, but I really believe that Freya missed the boat ages ago on how to design for big boobs. Their bras look great on F cups and thereabouts, but as the cup sizes climb, the proportions of the bra expand clownishly. The wires come up higher and higher between the breasts. The upper lace section gets bigger and bigger, throwing off the aesthetic proportions of the bra if it’s a different color or texture than the rest of the bra. This all translates to bras that look frumpier and frumpier on bigger-boobed customers. I’m not okay with that. Customers who don’t have many bra options will see a photo of a cute, skinny model with F-cups and order the bra, and then be disappointed with the huge difference in how it looks on them. Living in the US and usually not being able to try anything on, and with shipping being so expensive, these unlucky customers will come to terms with the way their bra looks and carry on, feeling a little less cute. Freya never sells their bras using pictures of models with REALLY big boobs because the bras wouldn’t sell then—they’d look unfashionable.

Freya Estelle on little boobs

Freya Estelle on big boobs...hmmm

2.    Freya doesn’t listen to their customers. With Panache asking fans on Facebook whether a 26 band might be a good addition, and Curvy Kate and Bravissimo producing every single bra in a huge size range, Freya has gotten totally left behind in terms of sizing. Their cute designs tend to stop at a G cup, and they stated on Facebook that they believe molded cups won’t support boobs above that size. Um, molded cups could easily provide way more support than flimsy fabric. Get it together.

Size range for Trudie bra on Bravissimo--gosh, notice what's selling out fastest!

3.     Freya doesn’t understand how to design straps. This complaint may be out of date, since I haven’t bought any Freya bras in about two years, and things may have changed since then. But when I did wear Freya bras all the time, they always had one of two kinds of straps. The first was cute and narrow, but made of a shiny material that slid off my shoulders constantly. The second and more common were these really thick, utilitarian straps that just looked absurd with sleeveless tops. Not only that, they were adorned with a criss-cross pattern of tiny rope which was heinous and always began to fall apart long before the bra wore out, so there were always little strings poking off my shoulders.

4.    Freya produces the same exact bra over and over with different names.

Go check out some of their past products. You’ll begin to realize that the Celia is the Estelle is the Nancy is the Latisha—same shape, same lace, just different patterns. The Clarissa is the same as the Lucy and the Antoinette. The Deco bra comes in solid colors as well as patterns but each pattern is named something different: Lydia, Frida, Carly, Crystal. Calling the same bra shape a million different names doesn’t mean you’re really giving your customers options on fit, it just means you’re misleading them. (I’m also bored of Freya’s repetitive designs and twee patterns, but that’s definitely just a matter of personal taste.)

Freya Nancy (left) and Latisha--these came out as separate models in the same season!

I would also like to note, on the other hand, that the Deco is one of the best bras in production, despite Freya's refusal to offer it in anything approaching a diverse size range. I'll write more about it later.